While visiting with a friend today, I asked how she was doing with Toastmasters. Without knowing it, we had joined different clubs within a short time of each other. It was fun to discover that we were traveling similar paths. She’s a fellow work-at-home, business-owner mom with two young children and she’s one of those ‘how-do-you-manage-to-do-that?’ mothers. She exudes this clarity about who she is, what she wants, and what she is willing and going to do to accomplish it.

At some point along the way, she noticed that Toastmasters ceased being what it was for her in the beginning. She just wasn’t as jazzed about it as she had been. And, she suspected that it might have been a way to distract herself from the business at hand … growing her business. When she talked about how she’d been feeling about Toastmasters, it was as though someone had thrown a wet blanket over her shoulders. She appeared to be saturated and dragging, and even a little wilted.

But, she also noticed something else … that when she recently stepped up her commitment to her business, she really tapped into her passion. And, it was so clearly present in her being. Her posture straightened when she talked of her business, her face positively beamed, and her vibrant smile reappeared. There was no back and forth. There was no hesitation. She was plugged in and she, and even I, could feel it.

And her priorities were also plainly clear … her family and her business were what lit her up and she knew that was where she wanted to spend her time and energy. But, she had also made and wanted to honor a commitment to Toastmasters, which usually involves two meetings per month (and one additional meeting for her as an officer). Rather than getting stuck in conflicted feelings, she simply rewrote the rules. She figured out how she could continue her work with Toastmasters in a way that fit in with the rest of her life and enabled her to focus more of her energy where she wants it.

What’s neat to me about this story to me is that my friend really paid attention to that inner voice … the one that let her know that something wasn’t working. And then she chose to do something about it. Simply noticing is great. We can get lots of insights by simply noticing what’s going on inside and how we respond to what’s going on outside. But it takes and extra something to choose to do something with that knowing.

Did Toastmasters loose it’s shine because it just got old and stale? Or did she come to realize that she no longer needed or wanted to be distracted from her passion?

Whatever the reason, she tuned in, rewrote the rules, and took action to shift the balance once again … Living in choice!

Do you find yourself still doing things that worked once upon a time, but no longer hold meaning for you? What could you let go of? Where could you rewrite the rules to shift your work/life balance to a more satisfying place?

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